The Bite That Hurts

Nothing can drive one crazier than not getting attention. Especially if you happened to be born drab, shy, and unexciting, like Goldie.

Goldie was quiet, plain-looking, and never made waves, not at her dull clerical job or at volunteer charity gigs where she did her chores and followed the directions of others. She knew she needed some color and drama in her life.

One night, she dyed her hair a vivid shade of red, made up her face with dark red lipstick and purple eye shadow, dressed in a black lace-trimmed gown and gold high heels, and went out to hit the clubs.

She flirted with all the men she met. One of them suggested they go back to his place. Goldie took the bait. She went to bed with him and acted like a she-lion, even sinking her teeth into his neck.

The next day, she was back at her job, a kerchief covering her hair, trying to be plain little Goldie again-until next time.

What happened next, was the next time-and she didn’t expect it. She was merely shopping at a little bargain store she always went to.

“There she is,” said the storekeeper. A man approached and flashed his police I.D. at her.

“You’re under arrest,” said the plainclothes cop.

He read her rights and handcuffed her.

She asked what this was all about.

It seemed the cops thought she was the dead ringer for a woman who had been shoplifting at that store and at other businesses. The store owners had described the shoplifter as a plain, drab, young woman.

“But it’s not me,” she whined. The cop did not care. He led her away. Only then, she noticed the tooth marks on his neck.

BIO: Lynne Bronstein is the author of Nasty Girls (Four Feathers Press) and four other books of poetry. She has been published in magazines ranging from Playgirl to Chiron Review,from Lummox to anthologies in England, Ireland, Israel, Canada, and India. Her short fiction has appeared in magazines and anthologies and has been read on National Public Radio. She also writes a column on Facebook and Substack called Show Biz Cats.

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